TRUMPET PRIDE

I’m in the Political Elite so I talk this way. I try not to be politically correct, preferring the locker room of New York City where guys joke about bleeding chicks and gunned down crooks. I live in New York City, the broadcast center of political correctness, along with satellite offices in Frisco, Berkeley, Venice, Cambridge and Santa Fe.

I’m always politically correct to the mugs richer than myself, like Mike Bloomberg. Maybe I can cut a deal with one or more of them and try to steal a billion or two. Most politically correct places are cesspools – too many people, too much trash, too many government services, too many feces, too many minorities, too many, too many, not enough drugs. I’m tired of too many and not enough. It’s not American. Few people in those towns want me to develop and build anything. I can’t list all the people I hate. Names on the list would stretch between New York City and China. Los Angeles approved a giant skyscraper now built with China-money, but I lost a bundle when I offered to build a 125 story jobbie away from downtown, where it wasn’t commercially feasible. I sold the property at a loss.

All big time real estate developers stick among the politically Elite. I can’t count how many brats of politicians I’ve put through school by giving them overpaid summer jobs. Black, brown, LGBT – I can’t tell which color. I don’t know if I always wear the same colored socks. I really want people to work in fast food restaurants in my buildings for peanuts. That’s why they have to get college money from drug deals – a terrific way to learn business: If you flub it, you die. So buy adulterated product, cut it, debase it, sell it as prime. Rich, using suckers are lucky to get off. I’m happy so long as my employees make the minimum wage and sell drugs.

New York City is full of drugs. I’m obviously above street deals, but my college courses never taught anyone anything. It is best to learn everything on the street in trial and error fashion. Real estate is the same way – the Art of the Steal. Consulting is best, a position unavailable in the drug business. I make more money consulting than I do in business. It’s my rosy reputation. I can answer with a cliche or perhaps dance a gig. I want all my employees to be like children, dependent, diligent, quiet and orderly. It is the primary means to make money – 99 cents for me, a penny for them.

That’s the way to be Elite, and that is bigger than the real ratio. The economy is running into the sewer, and Americans are suffering. When I become President, I’ll increase the National Debt, so people like me can make as much money as Bill and Hilary. They left the White House broke (so they said), and now have hundreds of millions. I’ll start with billions and end up with hundreds of billions. Meanwhile the United States will have 30 Trillion dollar debt.

I like being in the Elite not people with a prize 1959 Edsel. My father, Fred, knew that car was a flop. Among the rich and isolated I talk political incorrectness because it is easy. I don’t pretend that I care about anybody but me. I learn cliches and everyone knows what I’m talking about. They hear and talk about nothing but cliches and a few homilies. I consume day-old Twinkies and Caviar that Old Bald Vlad sends me. Little people have no right to demand respect from me. I can be rude and offensive because I don’t like any of them – strangers. I may deport them all if they don’t vote for me. I’ve fooled supporters who think I’m on their side. They are morons and retards. I’m standing on their shoulders.

My enemies have said because I think this way, they don’t need a degree in psychology; they don’t need to be a psychiatrist. Every American can know I can be diagnosed by watching the shows, like Doctor Phil. Because I think this way, I may have Borderline Personality Disorder, at the least.

I don’t want to bother the little people with my medical and mental conditions. They have their own childish concerns and petty problems. I tell them: Make money; Take my courses, Art of the Steal; Get a life; Work for peanuts; Eat garbage; Lick my caviar containers; Relish my pollution and hate.

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